It was an ordinary Saturday or Friday night and we were all headed to the BBQ. It was a good mix of food, Jamaicans in white linen and too much alcohol. After some last minute party jacking, we hit the road to return home.
The car was filled with loud voices, people screaming to be heard so Emma said, "Why are you guys so loud?" I responded saying something stupid as I generally do! Something like, "What are you the noise police?" So everyone else was like its not that serious man chill out. But for some reason it was serious at that specific time it was very serious, serious enough to throw a plate of food out of a moving car window whilst on the highway, yes whilst. I figured I show them how serious it was by throwing a plate of Jerk Chicken that Mad Dog and I had to argue with some Jamaican to get.
I'm not gonna lie and say I thought any further than that because...I didn't! Everybody in the car said what the hell is wrong with you and I think, o say I think, Mad Dog pushed me but I'm not sure, could've been that Wrey & Nephews playing tricks on my mind. So Wrey said, "Who pushed you?" Nephews didn't wait for an answer, so I punched Mad Dog whilst Emma Sat there in the middle. So Mad Dog hits back and Emma is caught in the middle. The driver pulls to the side of the road whilst Mad Dog and I are still pushing each other and I'm pushing Emma trying to push him and it was cray. The driver told me to walk home but when you gone off that W&N it doesn't matter so I says, "Pull over damn it, I ain't scared to walk." Again I'm on some highway some where with Wrey in my system! I probably would've been hit by a sandwich truck or something, but I love that Monkey Meat.
Mad Dog and Emma hop out the car and I just sat there. Don't know what the hell I was thinking, so Mad Dog opens the door and proceeds to hit me in the nose. The only defense I could muster up was placing my open hand in front of my nose, so that Mad Dog punches was hitting my hand then hitting my nose, that Floyd Mayweather defense. Mad Dog must have thought I had Pickley's on my pinky or something because he bit me. It was the rage of a thousand Haitians in that bite, he channeled his ancestors to give him force. I felt Romel in them teeth (inside joke). Immediately I yelped, "Ouch the nigga bit me!" I wanted to bite his ass back (no homosexual) but at that point I realized this had gone way too far. End scene. And by end scene I mean I don't remember what happened next.
The next thing I know, I'm pinned down on the grass by Mad Dog. I wasn't fighting back at this point because I had given up, plus the fact I couldn't move, Mad Dog was just too heavy. RIP Heavy D. The cops came screaming at me, The Driver is screaming at me the Indian-Looking Girl is looking at me with her Indian-Looking looking eyes. I remember saying something to The Driver like go home and smoke your pot weed head which was such a gay thing to say but I couldn't come up with anything at the time. The cops threw cuffs on me and everyone except Emma went home.
After explaining the difference between a scientist and a mechanic, whom I, Mad Dog and Positive Brother Hakeem had been discussing earlier, the cops let me go. Emma and I took a very quiet, super quiet, deathly quiet ride back. I knew I was tripping so I planned on apologizing, as I said, when my fingers were bit I knew it went too far. So we get back and I apologize and everything is starting to die down and then The Driver says to me, "You got something you want to get off ya chest nigga?" That hurt, especially coming from a girl, so I responded saying this and that trying to make her feel like I felt. Too mean to type, I didn't mean it. I do remember The Gypsy staring at me with her wide Gypsy eyes.
The Driver and The Indian Girl went home and there I was talking to Mad Dog. Again the situation got heated. Mad Dog had previously mentioned me getting jumped if something happened and said it again, and I, feeling threatened, had to say something. I remember, I said, "I'll call Pookie but Pookie name is Tyriq and he'll get all of y'all!" He replied, "I got niggas at 7-11, which coincidentally is seven to eleven minutes away from Mad Dogs house by foot, unless you're running, it may be like 5 minutes, anyways, he says by the time Tyriq come you gonna be done for, which is true. The commute was just too much, even without traffic, for Tyriq to come save me. Truth is, I do know the kid but I don't have his number, never did and probably never will but Mad Dog didn't know that. We not even friends on Facebook. I would've just went to the garage and slept on the bench. Emma's twin got fed up and walked away saying I needed to grow up and left me and Mad Dog talking on the couch. He asked a bunch of questions that I lied to, trying to make him mad. And the night was over but not the story.
The next day, I woke up and left, limping to the bus station and who do I see but Emma's twin. Had to look twice to confer, but yes it was her. I always joke about her being a drug dealer but this day was no joke. She pulled up to a car dealership but didn't get out the car and I think she turned the lights off, so naturally, being where I'm from, I thought she was going to shoot me. I tried to lean on a nearby pole to rest my poor leg just in case I had to run for my life, I already had a route, I was going to run against traffic on Merrick and make a left on Roeckel or whatever the hell that street is named. Fortunately, Emmas twin drove off and Beyonce Jr. gave me a ride to the train because the N4 fucking sucks!
It was a horrible night, one of the worst ever in my life for the sole purpose of disappointing myself. It's not a good feeling when you disappoint ya damn self. All in all I learned a lot of things, the main one being what the title says, "Never drink Wrey & Nephews."
